Thanks!

Thanks for your comments it really helped my mental jack out :) I ate the chili today and it was YUMMY! I didn't overdo it...1 bowl and I pased on the cake. I know my body and sugar is a KILLER! The chili was a "healthier" cheat IMO. It wasn't pizza or donuts ;) I am not going out with my hubby tonight though. I told him baby steps...

I am 13 weeks out! I've really been pushing myself earlier this year and NO bulking. I'm gonna do my best to get lean before the cruise so that the May 30th show won't be iffy like last year. If I come back from the cruise 1 lb over 120 i'm not doing the show. For my husband's mind and my body I think it's best. I'm not going through what I did last year.

With that being said...game on!

Hey!

Things are still going good here! Diet and cario and sleep....what else is there? I still feel fat though, can't wait for that to be over with.

I'm freaking out right now because Saturday we're going to Mike's parents to do our taxes. She is making chili. I hate to bring my own lunch but I guess I'll have to. It gets worse though. Mike's b-day is Friday, his friends are having a party for him Saturday night. You all know i'm a hermit and would rather just stay at home where it's safe from bad food and my meals are prepared. Not to mention I can do cardio whenever I want. How pathetic is that? How stupid do I sound? Sure in order to be a competitor you have to do things in life that most don't but seriously...this is NOT my life. I use to be fun and not worry but now it's just getting almost mental! Okay, my rant is over.

8 more days baby!! I can't wait to see Angela, Tina and Stacey again! I also can't wait to meet many of you and see Pauline Nordin in person! Seeing Monica, Jamie, Alison E, and Valerie W in person last year was just amazing! Angela and I were just in awe. That's the reason I want to stay home Saturday LOL!

Post your answers :)

I always find these interesting lol. Copy it and post your answers in comments!

1. Can you cook?
2. What was your dream growing up?
3. What talent do you wish you had?
4. Favorite place?
5. Favorite vegetable?
6. What was the last book you read?
7. What zodiac sign are you ?
8. Any Tattoos and/or Piercings?
9. Worst Habit?
10. Do we know each other outside of blogging?
11. What is your favorite sport?
12. Negative or Optimistic attitude?
13. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?
14. Worst thing to ever happen to you?
15. Tell me one weird fact about you:
16. Do you have any pets?
17. Do you know how to do the macarena?
18. What time is it where you are now?
19. Do you think clowns are cute or scary?
20. If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?
21. Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?
22. What color eyes do you have?
23. Ever been arrested?
24. Favorite fictional character of all time?
25. If you won $10,000 dollars today, what would you do with it?
26. If you could have one superpower, what would it be?
27. What’s your favorite hangout?
28. Do you believe in ghosts?
29. Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
30. Do you swear a lot?
31. Biggest pet peeve?
32. In one word, how would you describe yourself?
33. Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you?

Weekend Recap

I had an awesome Valentine's Day! We saw the movie Taken and it was AWESOME, then we went and ate at Bonefish Grill. I had the ahi tuna and broccoli like a good girl :) They gave us a bar of Lindt Chocolate but Mike snatched it up LOL! Then Sunday came. Boy was I moody. I did go and visit my family though which was a plus but I was just feeling fat. No one understands me when I get this way. I know a lot of you on here will know the EXACT feeling. Here I am 120 lbs and feeling like a whale? I seriously have mental issues with weight. Always have and i'm afraid I always will. Before I went to visit my mom she asked me to get her some carrots. When I put them on her counter I saw a "7 day soup diet" which is what she needed the carrots for. It was then that I realized I must have watched my mom and aunt diet when I was younger and it's embedded into my brain.

Once I hired Tony I thought all of that was changing. I mean I was eating right and becoming a happier person. Now though I know what I CAN look like even if it's not realistic. I do want to be 115 lbs...that's where I need to be ALL the time. No more people telling 120 is a healhty weight for me...I feel fat and don't like it.

I know it's not an everyday look but dang...why can't I remember being this thin?

Friday the 13th

Just because I need to laugh.....


I had back with running intervals today. My husband had to pump me up for the ending cardio because I just wasn't into it?? That is SO unlike me. I lost 2 lbs this week and i'm STARVING! I eat and then i'm STARVING. I've done this long enough to know the difference between boredom and the feeling of your stomach eating your spine?? Hopefully it's the metabolism kicking in? I am eating plenty!

I cannot wait for V-day tomorrow! My husband and I have a couple of dates :) I NEVER do anything anymore. I'm not gonna cheat though. I'm having tuna and broccoli from Bonefish Grill. I plan on taking the WHOLE day off from workouts.

I can't believe the Aronld is almost here! Ugh..that means so is inventory. That is my job and it SUCKS! The way the economy is going though it might not be before long.

I'm Neutral

Which American accent do you have? Neutral You're not Northern, Southern, or Western, you`re just plain -American-. Your national identity is more important than your local identity, because you don`t really have a local identity. You might be from the region in that map, which is defined by this kind of accent, but you could easily not be. Or maybe you just moved around a lot growing up.

Click Here to Take This Quiz Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.

You're not Northern, Southern, or Western, you`re just plain -American-. Your national identity is more important than your local identity, because you don`t really have a local identity. You might be from the region in that map, which is defined by this kind of accent, but you could easily not be. Or maybe you just moved around a lot growing up
Sweet, that pretty much sums it up! My hubs always makes fun of my mom's accent. He says she says cold, coat, code all the same, oh and the Colt's ;) My grandma, boy she is from Kentucky and i'm talking the sticks. He still doesn't understand her and i'm not sure I even do sometimes.

I had a ho hum leg workout tonight. TOM is trying to arrive ugh....not an excuse it just is. My weight is down 2 lbs from last week though, felt thinner this morning so I had to weigh. That's even with Aunt Flo about to show! So, my next weigh in will be probably next Thursday. It's just a good weigh for me to keep in check ;)

I must, I must...

I must increase my bust! I know,I know,I know that they will grow! My cousin, sister and I use to chant this when we were little. It REALLY worked for them. I was chanting it during my chest workout tonight. I can honestly say that I have some man pecs! My hubs is jealous :) I LOVE to work chest! I can see striations and veins since I obviously don't have any fat there. I also love to work abs for that same reason!

I'm having a good day. I feel lighter and my eating and workouts have been awesome so I know something good has to be happening. My morning cardios have been THE bomb!!!

I WILL be going out this weekend for Valentine's Day. It's not a cheat, ahi tuna and steamed broccoli. I can't wait! We're also going to see Taken...I heard it's really good? I love dates!

Full Steam Ahead!

I had an AWESOME early cardio session this morning. I'm anxious to get up and do it again! Worked shoulders tonight...did shrugs but with light weights ;) I was feeling REALLY lean yesterday, today not so much. Oh well, we all have those days. I have a little less than 8 weeks before my cruise! I would love to lose 10 lbs but realistically not sure if that's possible. I think an easy to maintain and healthy weight for me would be 115. That gives me a little wiggle room :) I still haven't weighed since last Tuesday and it makes me less stressed about things. When the time comes I know I can drop the numbers but really who cares about them? I know Monica Brant doesn't weigh 107 and I would LOVE to look like her!

2 days!

I haven't weighed in 2 days :) The scale has not been my friend lately. I'm eating exactly what is written on paper. Okay, not really. I get a TBSP of almond butter but i've talked with Tony about that. I know that would not be possible. I would eat the entire jar in 1 sitting. Instead I buy individual portions of almonds and that way i'm okay.

My workouts have been AWESOME! The carido I do in the mornings are intense and just when I feel like quitting I don't...I continue, i'm a badass!

So why am I gaining weight? This is the frustrating part. Is the food I ate during Christmas just now going through my system or what? I'm trying to not let it bother me. I feel fine today since I didn't weigh this morning ;) I'm still wearing my 4's although they aren't fitting as nicely. Don't worry, my shirts are big so there is not a noticeable muffin top.

So that's my wrap up this week. The scale sucks, muscles don't!

Why am I freaking out that Mike and I are going out to eat for Valentines Day?? I really have issues. We are going to Bonefish Grill! I love fish :)

I'll leave you with this...why I keep going. I've only just begun, I will get there some day(without boobs).

In Love...

With this website. I will probably never make anything from it but it sure is fun to think about!

I got a new meal plan on Saturday. I've been on it for 2 days and i've gained weight?? I'm not gonna get discouraged though. My body was without carbs for a LONG time so it's probably thinking WTF! It had enough carbs during Thanksgiving and Christmas to last for months and months though ;)

My workouts have been awesome! It's amazing what a 15 lb weight gain does for your strength :) Now that i'm 100% healed up my cardio are kick ass again so hopefully i'll start shedding some lbs. My cruise is right around the corner YIKES!