Thursday, May 29, 2008

That's My Girl!

Wednesday, May 28, 2008


WARN YOUR LOVED ONES!!!You've heard about people who have been abducted and had their kidneys removed by black-market organ thieves. My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. I went to sleep and woke up with someone else's thighs. It was just that quick. The replacements had the texture of cooked oatmeal.

Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine? I spent the entire summer looking for my thighs. Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans. And then the thieves struck again. My butt was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they took pains to match my new rear-end to the thighs they had stuck me with earlier. But my new butt was attached at least three inches lower than my original! I realized I'd have to give up my jeans in favor of long skirts.
Two years ago I realized my arms had been switched. One morning I was fixing my hair and was horrified to see the flesh of my upper arm swing to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This was really getting scary - my body was being replaced one section at a time. What could they do to me next? When my poor neck suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a turkey neck, I decided to tell my story.
Women of the world, wake up and smell the coffee! Those 'plastic' surgeons are using REAL replacement body parts -stolen from you and me! The next time someone you know has something 'lifted', look again - was it lifted from you?
THIS IS NOT A HOAX. This is happening to women everywhere every night. WARN YOUR FRIENDS!
P.S. Last year I thought some one had stolen my Boobs. I was lying in bed and they were gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I was relieved to see that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept . Now I keep them hidden in my waistband.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Don't Feel Bad for Me :)

So I have been a bit depressed about not doing the show and i've had too many peanuts and enjoyed some popcorn (100 cal pk) plus a bite or two of apple strudel today but hey, I was depressed right? WRONG! That sort of thinking is what puts the fat on your ass! Sure i'm looking slim and trim right now and I don't think that stuff is effecting me but in the long wrong who am I kidding? Do I want to be on the treadmill for 2 hours a day at 6 weeks out? HELL NO! Whew, who was that? That was my evil bipolar side Amber ;)

So anyway, i'm leaving for Florida on Friday night now. I will behave on this vacation. There will not be food 24/7 loaded with butter and cookies at night and.....yeah. This is where we'll be shacking up WOO! I was going to go the show on Saturday for the heck of it but I think that would just kill me. I actually was looking forward to meeting Tracy and this other girl I know who is doing the show. Oh well, I'll see them in September.


I was just checking the blogtalkradio to make sure there wasn't one today. My husband really digs the opening music LOL! It came on and he's like oh are you listening to one of those shows today, he knew hee hee! It makes me remember why I love him. Sometimes I don't know how he puts up with me but he does.

Oh, it's getting ready to storm YIKES!!!!

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Blogger friends

I swear this blogging is the best. I feel like I know each and every one of you. I hope someday we can all meet. Someone needs to write Oprah. I'm a redneck from Indiana so my vocabulary isn't the best. Hmmm.....Stacey you are good at writing! I know you're a redneck too but you can pull it off! Martha you're an English teacher right? Get on it! I bet you crack up reading my e-mails! I know my hubby does.

Anyhow, I went to Oaken Barrel, Angela remember that place? I ended up having the Greek Salad w/ Chicken. I totally didn't want the BBQ for some reason. It was like I didn't really deserve it? BUT trust me if you've comp dieted before it felt like a cheat. Plus it has feta cheese and these little warm pita triangles. Do you guys really think I would be an angel? We also had chips and salsa for an appetizer LOL! I even ate the chips that looked greasy...mmm.....clogged arteries. It was nice to get out though.

We also took Boomer to Brown County State Park yesterday. My legs are KILLING me this morning! Flat Indiana? Not this place and that's why we go so much. It's our little heaven away from home. It's peaceful, hilly, full of trees, and Boomer loves it! She always manages to poop on the pathway though. Yes, I have THAT dog who poops on the path. We had a relaxing time though.

I am still upset that I won't be competing next weeekend. I almost thought about doing it anyway. Tony said that if i'm not better than last year than why do it? It's the same promoter and it would almost be a slap in the face to them. HA! Do I really look that bad? I know I don't so that is all that matters. When I look at my pictures I feel great about my body right now! I'm going to have a blast in Florida! We might actually leave a day earlier now!

A couple of months ago when I was a bit fluffier I would look at my contest pics and think, can I actually get that small again? Was that just a fluke or what? Now I know it's possible and that is going to make me work harder this time around! I really need to add size to my arms. I'm also looking at 1 piece suits. If anyone has any suggestions on styles or colors let me know!

I'm going to go walk Boomer in Squirrel Park now. Later today i'll go to my mom's and we'll lay out in the sun. This is a Indy 500 tradition for us. We've been doing it since I was 10! I'll be packing my chicken or tuna to take over there. I may sneak a tbsp of PB though ;)

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Verdict is in

It's a no. I won't be competing next weekend. I'm still gonna go strong though and get down to 112 and see how easily I can maintain so I don't have to kill myself. It should be easier without all the holidays in the middle of it.

So now i'm going to Oaken Barrell and eat my BBQ! Don't worry Tony said I could ;)

The most exciting part is I only have to do an hour of cardio everyday! Woo, that's a piece of cake! Mmmm.....cake.....


I sent Tony my pictures last night and i'm waiting on his final verdict. Judging from our long conversation yesterday there is not going to be a good outcome.....stay tuned.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

I Love You Guys :)

Thanks for all your wonderful comments. It really helps keep me going! I'm working my bootay off, literally I hope. I have 9 more days and we'll see what happens. I weighed in at 118 this morning though WOO! I've mentally told myself if I weigh more than 115 I won't do it. I know weight isn't everything but mentally that's my thought. I'm feeling leaner and tighter everyday so it's just a waiting game. Let this be a lesson to not go hog wild on a cruise at 8 weeks out! I only gained 3 lbs last year but I was still on the i'm losing weight high and I didn't want to mess anything up. This time I thought what the heck i'm gonna be good for the next 7 weeks so I ate a TON! Not good ;)

I'm hoping to weigh 115 by Sunday and then when I water deplete maybe i'll actually lose a lot this time around? Last time I think I lose only 3 lbs that week. We'll see. I always have a plan and when it comes to weight it never works out LOL! My legs are literally like lead right now though. This cardio is grueling even though it's low intensity.

Oh and you fat girls at work, the fresco style meals at Taco Bell aren't going to help you lose any weight. Especially when you're snacking on something every hour. Yeah, I said it!

Tuesday, May 20, 2008


I was wondering if my HR would even read over 9,999 calories so I decided to kill myself last week. I got it to 10326 and this is what it looks like :) This is workouts only also.

I'm also wondering if i'll really get on stage next weekend? I weighed yesterday morning and I was STILL 121. I've been there for the last 3 weeks. I don't know what else I can do. I'm doing my workouts like mad, eating VERY clean not even mustard this time and still nothing. I don't think TOM is going to make it this month which is fine with me.
Tony called me and we had a long talk. He told me that he cannot possibly give me anymore cardio or cut my calories or my metabolism would suffer. So we are just taking it one day at a time and he will let me know if i'm ready next week or not. He asked me if I would be okay if it doesn't happen. I assured him it would because i'm leaving for vacation the week after so I will be slim and trim then :) So it's TBD if i'll actually compete or not WISH ME LUCK! I'm not giving up! On a positive note he told me to keep my HR between 130~135, that's much easier for me right now.
My husband is not too happy though. He said i'm getting on stage no matter what! This almost makes me feel good and that I don't look too bad or he wouldn't want me too. I just wish my upper body was bigger so people would focus on that instead of my big arse HA! Mike said this will if anything be good stage experience. I told him if I felt ready I would do it, but if i'm uncomfortable there is no way.
Stayed tuned......

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Another Gorgeous Day!

I took Boomer to the park and we walked to my dad's. On the way she got her nose scratched or bit by a little mini pin grrr....I should have let her eat the thing. Stupid small dogs!!!! We had a good time except for that :)

Stef, I use a heart rate monitor with a chest strap to calculate the cals.

Okay, here is the song i'm going to use unless I can't find an edited version. I have a back up just in case. If you have kids in the room don't play this. Remember don't judge me, I don't typically listen to devil music nor have I ever been in the goth thing LOL! This song just gets me pumped up!


I just ate my lunch and i'm waiting on the food to settle in my stomach and then it's up to do more cardio...ugh! Oh, and I did get to talk with Tony yesterday and he said he wishes I could do cardio sometime during the day but he understands that I have a job. Well i'm going to go to the park and walk for a half an hour now. Yes, stupid me told him this is doable. He told me just to walk and it doesn't have to be an all out sweatfest. This is fine though because I hate staying at work on lunch hour er..45 mins but i'll be taking an hour now they'll never know ;) This will also keep me from going shopping everyday. They are in process of putting a Kohl's around where I work, oh lord!

****Edited to say this is the edited version WOOT!!****

Saturday, May 17, 2008


It's a perfect day out today! I got up got my dog and went to the park for a long walk. I got home and got another half an hour of cardio in, got my hair highlighted and went to visit my mommy. My grandma and grandpa stopped by when I was there which made it even better. I got home sat on the deck for a bit. Decided I needed a nap so Mike and I went up stairs closed the blinds and slept for an hour an a half LOL! So much for the nice day but I feel refreshed!

Now im gonna go do my bi/tri/ ab workout and then 1 more hour of cardio. I am so gonna go over 10,000 calories! I can't wait to see if the HR goes that high! I'll take a picture ;)

Angela thanks for the tank top in the mail!!!! :)

Tomorrow i'll let you all know what song i'm using for the T-walk.....don't judge me ;)

Oh and i've missed 2 calls from Tony today so my phone is NOT leaving my side for the rest of the night!

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

2.5 weeks to go!

So I posted new pics in the photos section to the right. Boy I have a lot of work to do in 2.5 weeks but if you look at my 5 weeks out i've been working it! I'm kind of dissappointed that i'm losing some muscle in my arms. That or I still just have lots of fat of there? I do carry lots of fat on the tricep area. Overall i'm feeling good. My ribs aren't showing like they did last time and that's okay.

Tony says i'm leaning out but he doesn't know why my waist isn't getting leaner? My waist is 25" I don't give a crap about that! LOOK AT MY A$$! The freaking smilies are gone??? I don't know how that happened but i'm happy about it! My legs are so jacked up ugh.....oh well at least i'm alive and can walk. He told me today that I needed to......oh gosh here it comes......add......man I can't possibly add more.........2.......WTF is he going to do to me........more..........kill me now........tbsp of flax oil LOL!!!! WHEW!!!!

All of this so I can enjoy:

Cowboy Caviar
Hot Tri-colored Corn Tortilla Chips Served
with a Warm Dip of Layered Cream Cheese,
Mexican Vegetables, Black Beans, and Cheddar.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

My Day Dreams.....

This what i'll be having after my show

YUM!!! .....Click on link to see menu

Cowboy Caviar
BBQ sandwich and coleslaw
Turtle Ice Cream Pie

I know that is pathetic but it's where i'm at right now. What's really pathetic is I was living it up on that cruise 5 weeks ago. I wasnt' burning 1550 cals a day though.

Listening to the podcast now WOO! Go Tosca you ROCK!!!

I'm gonna take pics either tonight or tomorrow for Tony...sucks because TOM is on his way and you can totally tell. I didn't have to deal with him for awhile last year and that was nice.

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Girl Bonding

Today was such a perfect day. Mike and I took Boomer for a long walk in the park and it was gorgeous out. Then I went shopping with Kira and Jodi :) I bought myself a Mother's Day present. A Vera Bradley bag and I LOVE it! I'm not a purse person and I think Coach bags are stupid but I love this thing. I also bought a little wallet to match.

Us girls mainly hung out in Starbucks and chatted, it was great! Kira was looking for something for a photo shoot is why we are in the lingerie section LOL! I don't know why my face looks fat but it's getting slimmer so i'm not worried.

I've burned 7300 cals so far this week and I still have 1 workout to go today and 2 tomorrow. My weight this morning was 120.6 but I think TOM is coming. So much for losing it again this time around. I think I gained a little more than I wanted to on the cruise ;) I wanted to be around 110 for this comp and I think that's still doable....we'll see!!!

Friday, May 9, 2008


I'm so glad this week is over! Tomorrow we had planned to go hiking in Brown County but its been raining a lot and it'll probably be muddy. I already promised Boomer that we would do something fun so now I have to think of something. I'm getting sick of Squirrel Park but i'm sure she's not.

Been busting my arse these past few weeks and it's really starting to show. I'm just holding onto fat around my hips and it's driving me CRAZY! I know it will go but is 3 weeks enough time? As mentioned my butt is big and that is okay with me but come on love handles BE GONE!!

I also need to start getting thing ready like:

  1. Do I have enough Protan and Jan Tana left over?
  2. Where are my earrings and bracelet?
  3. Does my suit still fit and how do I get it unknotted?
  4. Music burned(you're going to love what i've chosen)
  5. Will my toenails grow out enough for a pedicure?
  6. After show outfit
  7. What to eat afterwards

Okay that's enough crazy thoughts for now.

Good luck to all competing tomorrow! Enjoy it and cherish every moment!

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Oh my legs...

Yeah, I had legs today. Sorry VQ my heart rate got to 165 during this?? Am I on the brink of death or what? It felt good though. I only have one more cardio session left for the day. I'm getting excited because i'm seeing my abs again WOO! I still have fat on my hips and pooch of course. I KNOW the pooch will be there until May 31st though. I don't even care what my ass looks like, is that bad? As long as it fits in my suit i'll be alright HA!

Speaking of suits, my friend Jodi has a purple one she isn't wearing this time around. She is the one who Jamie Eason gave a couple of suits to and she'll be wearing that one. So i'm going to try it on and see what that looks like. I know the butt is a little more skimpy but it may make my butt look smaller and I need all the help I can get! We'll see, when I get the suit i'll take pics and you all can judge :) I LOVE my suit of course but it's all about the visual.

I hadn't crapped since Saturday before my detox and I finally got something out today...aahhhh I feel much better.

I can't wait for the weekend to see what Tiny Tina and Martha Muscles looks like at their show!!

Monday, May 5, 2008



Detox Day = Death

I survived! I actually made it through the day! This morning my stomach is FLAT! I only lost .2 lbs but I feel wonderful! The weird thing is I wasn't hungry AT ALL?? Most of you understand when I say I wanted to eat though.

I had zero energy yesterday. Mike and I took Boomer for a walk in the park and typically my HR is 135~150 during that and yesterday it was 75~101 WTFudge? I was trying to get in as much cardio as I could though. Then I got on the treadmill and started doing a warmup where my HR is 100~110 and it was only 89 so I did the treadmill for 15 mins because I can burn that laying in bed ;) I also walked to Kroger and bought some asparagus. Thoughts of buying almonds pondered me but I did not crack. I slept A LOT yesterday and didn't think I would be able to sleep last night WRONG! I slept all night! Tressa as my witness, I was up and at 'em this morning.

I took my "cocktail" hopped on the treadmill and had tons of energy and got my HR to 182! I also had a dream last night that I was on my detox and that night I ate pizza aaaahhhh!!! It was so real LOL!!

Saturday, May 3, 2008

Big Cheese

Okay, so I always wondered if my hubby really enjoyed me doing this. Well yesterday I was telling him about the "detox" I will be doing tomorrow and he has seen the results of what I have accomplished in this past week since he's been gone. He asked me if I realize that most people couldn't do what I do? He said he is very proud of me :) Of course i'm thinking I wish I didn't have to do what I have to do to lose weight HA!

I hit my goal of 7500 calories burned and may even get to 8500 tomorrow WOO! I weighed in this morning at 121.6. My progress pics are under "my photos" in case you're wondering :)


Friday, May 2, 2008

No worries

Howdy! My hubby is back and I got the best night's sleep finally. I think Boomer did too since she didn't have to worry about her mommy as much. I don't feel empty anymore although I think my blood pressure has already risen LOL!

I had THE best ab workout yesterday! I always wondered what happened to those lovely V-ups I use to do when I first started. The'yre back!!

I have pictures and weigh in tomorrow. Last time my weight was 123.8 so we'll see. Visually I can tell i'm tightening up so that's a sign. I was concerned with my weight because i'm up 10 lbs from where I was at this time last year. I don't know if the 21000 cals I ate on the cruise has anything to do with that or not? Tony told me he is aware of that and not to worry. He put me on a detox day Sunday. Actually I chose Sunday because he asked me what day of the week would be best. I'm anxious to see what this involves this time.